Whatever It Takes

August 17, 2022

I Hear You, Liz. I’m Not Sure Everyone Did. But I Want You to Know…I Heard You. I Guess You Had to Go Through With. The Ass-Pounding that was Your Historically Embarrassing 66%-29% Republican Primary Loss. In Wyoming. With the Last Name Cheney. Must Have Been Rough. On Dad, too.

But Cheney’s Aren’t Quitters. That’s Obvious. And While Your Defeat Was Humiliating…You Took One For the Team. Had to Play it Out…So You Could Give Your…Concession Speech. You’re Gonna Catch a Lot of Shit for That, Too. Invoking Lincoln and All That.

But They Don’t Understand You, Liz. Not Like I Do. They’re Going to Say Shit Like, “How Dare Liz Cheney Compare Herself to Lincoln!” They Don’t Get It. Yet. They Will. I Do.

They Understood Part of Your Message. The Part Where You Basically Announced Your Intention to Run Against Trump in 2024. In the Primary. Or the General. Because “...I love what our party has stood for. But I love my country more.” May want to clean up the “Our party” vs “My country” thing though. People could get the wrong impression. But if Trump Runs? You Make Sense. Perfect Sense. 

I’m sure Nikki’s Willing to Play Speed Bump in the Primary…on behalf of the US-MIC. Won’t Win, but Might Slow Him Down. Hillary’s Salivating for the General. And If They Want…Need…Trump to Win…They’ll Toss Her and Her Pink Pussy Hat Army into the Arena. Instant Birth Control on a National Scale. But You? You Might Have The Right Stuff. Really. Liz vs. Trump in a Dick-Measuring Contest? Pick ‘em.

Look at Your Breeding. Dad. 9/11. Afghanistan. Iraq. There’s No Limit to How Far You’ll Go. No Depths Below Which You Won’t Sink. Grab ‘em by the Pussy? Child’s Play. Which is Why I Understood Your Commitment that “I will do whatever it takes to make sure Donald Trump is never again anywhere near the Oval Office.”

When you say “It is entirely foreseeable that the violence will escalate further, that [Trump] and others continue purposely to feed the danger.”...your Reference to the Battle of the Wilderness where “In two days of heavy fighting, the Union suffered over 17,000 casualties…Their courage saved freedom. And if we listen closely, they are speaking to us down the generations…” was Not Lost on Me. 

I Get It. You’re Prepared to Invoke Civil War. When The Establishment…the Full Weight of the Establishment…Cannot Muster More than 30% of the Republican Primary Vote…in Wyoming? For a Cheney? When The Propaganda Has Stopped Working? When the Election Fraud Has Stopped Working? What Else Is There?

I Know…You’ll Do Whatever It Takes. You’ll Go Beyond the Fake Pandemics. The Toxic Gene Therapy Mandates. You’re Amassing Your Troops…as Sad as They May Be. Gotta Work with What You Got, right? 

But Be Careful, Liz. I’m Not Sure How Well These Young Troops…Excuse Me…Special Agents…Eager to “combine your accounting skills with law enforcement skills to investigate financial crimes”...because “no matter what the source, all income earned, both legal and illegal, has the potential of becoming involved in crimes…” Have The Right Stuff. Not Like You.

Those…at least 21, but no older than 37…able to “carry a firearm and be willing to use deadly force, if necessary…” Even with Salaries Starting at $50,704. May Not Be Ready. To Go Knocking on Doors. Doors of Ranchers. Farmers. Americans…Outside of Jackson Hole.

Jackson Hole. Where You Gave Your Concession…Invocation…Speech. The Only Area of Wyoming in which You Remain Welcome. Jackson Hole. Once Home to Cowboys and Ski Bums…now Priced Out by the Celebrity and Billionaire Class Who Jet in from Cali and NYC…Making sure to Touch Down for 181 Calendar Days a Year…to Avoid Paying Those Nasty State Taxes…Where They Actually Live. Jackson Hole…also Host of The Fed’s “Let’s Discuss the Best Ways to Fuck The People This Year” Annual Meeting.

But You Know That, Too. You Know What’s Going to Happen. When Your Army of Karens. Fully “Vaxxed”...and Eager for More…No Mandates Necessary With This Group of Special Agents. Male, Female…and a Whole Lot More. Endless Pronouns. As Endless as Their Thirst for Conflict. They’ll Bring Their Twitter Fighting Skills to…the Real World.

This Crack Team of Karen Special Agents, Fully-Armed, Barely-Trained…Marching to Patriotic Americans’ Front Doors…Brimming with Fear and Excitement. Blissfully Unaware of Things like…Constitutional Rights. With One Message…Comply or…Die?

They’ll Confront Patriotic Americans Struggling to Survive…to Provide for Their Families…the Ones Attempting to Live with Dignity and Preserve Freedom….for All of Us. The Ones without Tax Attorney’s On Call. The Ones Incapable of Taking the IRS to Court…Spending Thousands, Tens of Thousands, More…to Fight Off the Power of the State and Their Baseless Assertions and Claims. The Ones Who Actually Live in Wyoming and Places Like It…But Not Jackson Hole. The Ones Who Own Firearms. Know How to Use Them. Maybe Lost Their Jobs Due to Their Refusal to Inject Themselves. Or Lost Their Business because of…”Covid.”

You Know What Will Happen. Patriotic Americans Will Act…Rationally. And When Confronted with the Irrational? Conflict. And Thanks To You…Armed Conflict. The Fact that Your “Special Agents” Won’t Stand a Chance…Or About as Much of a Chance as the Poor Ukrainian Conscripts also Being Thrown to the Front Lines…also to Die? That’s the Point…Isn’t It?

The Fight Itself Will Be Your Victory. Each Death a Trophy. Because If You Can’t Rule “Your Country”...No One Can. There Can Be No Country. I Understand Your Plan. Your Goals. You. The Establishment.

The Way You Lose? You Win. You Enter the Race. You and Your Giant Cheney Dick. Bust It Out and Bitch Slap Trump With It. Endlessly. Humiliate Him. Be Ruthless. Please. Do What Jeb Should Have Done…If He Wasn’t Such a Pussy. Reveal Trump to be the Fraud That He Is. Bring Out That Cheney Family Strength…that Cheney Family 9/11-Level Evil.  

End the Fallacy…of Trump the Savior. Show America The Power of The Establishment. The Uniparty. Ride Your Wyoming Republican Primary 29% to The White House. Horrify Us All. Do Whatever It Takes. Keep Jackson Hole Safe…from the Voters.

Watch what is happening. Not what they tell you is happening.

• August 17, 2022